Jaded

It's hard to believe that just 1 month ago we were so damn happy
Now I'm sitting here wondering how can I stay?
You say, I haven't given you what you need
I don't give you enough understanding
The thing is when I try to give you understanding
You silently leave me sitting in my wonderment

I can honestly say
this is the first time
I didn't see it coming
It felt so good along the way
I ignored every taste of discomfort
disillusioned
I happily went along with your bullshit

Now I can see that
what is coming
Is much worse
Way more lonely then the lonely nights I already have
I gotta learn not to text you
Or care as much

I caught myself
today staring into the space before my eyes
stunned and kinda stupid
thinking about all the things you said to me

I just don't think
I have the strength to trust you
the way that I need to

You can blame my
ex wife
the way you always have
she lied, cheated and mislead me for 8 years

Now when you
say you going out town
just to work
your next breath you said oh yeah, and to be free

Wow,
Well fuck all of that
I will find a way
to uncoil myself from around you
I will find a way to forget the plans
But I will never forget how this went down
And it just adds to all the reasons why I am
Jaded

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