Quixotic

I wish this post was going to be happy, but it isn't. This is what happened Still Your Jadore and teddy bear are in my truck you tell me you need him to take care of your mom you expect me to be okay with him kicked back in your bedroom watching the game, because after all he is there to help with your mother I'm suppose to hold on for more than 30 minutes while you close the deal I'm expected to pay for hotel rooms they we didn't use Only long enough for me to scream your name once It's 6am, I got to get up from your bed and your house because he is coming to have breakfast with your mom We can't get married We can't move in I can't come over because he is already there You want me to stand holding my heart my longing and all my needs still silent and beneath your husband

T iny things I notice all the time a half smoked black and mild strawberry flavored chapstick jammed between the sidewalk crack Wondering about all things that will be in the future you know after we are all gone 200 years ahead Saddens me sometimes to think of things new; old and thrown away todays sudans tomorrow's junk car piled up like metal mountains Holidays approaching I'm going to enjoy before its history Are we but much different our youth and beauty strong and vibrant yet we are falling into being wrinkled and gray day by day Things I don't want to think about but have no choice when I talked to my Grandma today Once she was more like a movie star long locks and high cheek bones I have to acknowledge or at least consider I too will wither... Copyright 2010 CS Knight

I jumped up to follow you out into the shock of icy stillness I stood teeth shattering at your 1/3 cracked window We had ran into your Ex again I wasn't tired of you just tired of you mentioning her I talked enough for you to ask me to get in I sat passionately all my words coming at once I still shivered Expressive you changed your approach More like you knew you had found something in me and I knew I had something in you I try to act like I'm going to leave and you let me think I'm going to leave Until I end up saying, don't go Your kisses warmed me up calmed me down You say that I tell you that I love you, with my eyes I don't know how I did all I remember is the entire time I was barefoot in November..

Right now I'm just trying to balance everything. I'm working on a degree, I work full-time, I have a family. I'm staying focused on what is important and trying not to get distracted with things that just aren't that important to me, like meetings and office memos about keeping my office door open during the day. Which I have a problem anyway with management sending out blanket memos to address just a few rule breakers. My relationship is at best, going in the right direction. Of course there is always room for improvement, yet I feel satisfied and content with my partner, that doesn't mean I'm sparred from moments of fustration or anger when we have difficult times. I just always come back to the smiles she brings after a long day. I'm always looking forward to our next sushi dinner or red box night. Again I'm just trying to balance it all.

Fierce sighs Gobble   Intimacy Ravished Angry We talk about making love instead Pissed I give in to bickering and rebellion Laughter Kept brief Old jokes Sink We used to Have joy Now Nitpicks taint Past Finger tips Touch the present In old dusty accusations I hold To Nothing But Our first kiss Copy right 2010 Q

She lingers through my experiences placing grains of sand in my dreams Pouring down hour glasses rain wiggles down Drenching our steam consumed in her lips Spinning french kisses I'm so transparent to her Sometimes I wanna hide from her naked opinion of me She knows I love her She knows I crave her She knows I don't want anyone else In her eyes I see her possession of me And I have willing surrendered as puddles collect after the storm No choice they just dwell peacefully She like the water holds me in a space tight like peppermint in a package...

Well things are... moving along. My relationship is in good standing, seems like we have finally gotten to the place where we understand each other much better, and we are able to communicate our feelings easier. That is actually a HUGE bonus. She has alot going on right now, and I'm showing her plenty of support. Ive been really busy with work, and other projects. Looking forward to the upcoming holidays with my family and friends. I'm very concerned about what my partner is going through with her family right now. As I said earlier I'm being supportive, you know helping her through all of it. I'm worried about how things might impact the relationship at some point. I hope I'm not being selfish, but it's an observation. She may even have to change her current living arrangement. All I can do is hope that things work out for her, and then for us. Everyone has issues, I just I hope I am able to maintain through all of what she has going on. It's funny, I use...